What is Social-Emotional Learning (SEL)?

First, what is social-emotional learning? The Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning (CASEL) defines Social-Emotional Learning as “the process through which all young people and adults acquire and apply the knowledge, skills, and attitudes to develop healthy identities, manage emotions and achieve personal and collective goals, feel and show empathy for others, establish and maintain supportive relationships, and make responsible and caring decisions.”

SEL focuses on five skill sets:

• Self-awareness
• Relationship skills
• Self-control (or self-management)
• Social awareness
• Responsible decision-making

All of these skills are essential to every person living a healthy life with others. Yet, these are very skills that so many autistic children and teens (and adults) struggle with every day.

Many times, schools – especially special education classrooms and support programs – will teach SEL skills to students. Some school systems implement SEL best practices across all their classrooms to support all students and not just those who have Individualized Education Plans (IEP).

At school, SEL could look like:

• An activity in which a teacher will have students identify how they are feeling at the moment since being aware of their emotions is a key foundational aspect of SEL.
• A session during which the teacher talks about coping strategies for dealing with certain emotions such as grief or anger and the importance of learning emotional control.
• An exercise that discusses the differences between healthy and unhealthy relationships and how to make and keep friendships.

During your autistic child’s next IEP planning session, be sure to ask their team if they could add SEL to your child’s plan if they haven’t already.

How can Social-Emotional Learning help those with autism?

Social skills, effective communication and emotional regulation are challenges at the heart of autism. Autistic people think differently because of the way their brain has developed, and it can be difficult for them to communicate and build relationships the way neurotypicals do. It’s also hard for them to understand and control their emotions.

Social-emotional learning is a key to helping those with autism develop these essential skills in life. It can help them immensely in school, at home and in their future lives at work and in their community. SEL can help them:

• Regulate their emotions
• Be more self-aware
• Build more positive relationships
• Increase their self-esteem
• Teach them how to set goals and make good decisions
• Foster independence
• Enhance social skills
• Help them communicate more effectively

I now can see where my son J’s speech therapist in elementary school incorporated SEL into his social skills and communication training. It definitely helped him be more aware of his emotions and how to better manage them along with improving his social awareness.

Ways you can support your autistic child’s Social-Emotional Learning

So, how can you as a parent or caregiver support Social-Emotional Learning for your child with autism? Here are some suggestions.

1. Role play different scenarios with your autistic child

Role play is a wonderful way to help your child better understand how to act socially and emotionally to different situations. (I wrote an entire post about role play, and it includes a link to my role playing guide you can download for free.)

2. Model behaviors for your child

Children pick up so much by watching our actions and behaviors. Your child will learn from you by watching you effectively manage your emotions, interact with others and communicate well.

3. Look for teachable moments

Teachable moments are available every day for all of us. When you see good and bad examples of emotional control and social interactions, point them out to your child and discuss them. What went well? What could have been better? What could you or they improve in future situations?

4. Help them identify their emotions

Learning how to control emotions better first requires accurate identification of them. I think many autistic children have the big ones – happiness, sadness, anger, fear – figured out. I believe many children need help in identifying some of the more subtle ones and putting names to them – irritability, frustration, confusion, worry, contentment, optimism and many more. You could use an emotions chart and social stories to help your child identify their feelings.

5. Assist your child with learning perspective-taking

Being able to understand other people’s point of views or feelings can go a long way in improving relationships. That is why it’s important to help your autistic child learn perspective-taking. Read this blog post for suggestions about how to help your child improve this skill.

6. Teach your autistic child problem-solving skills

Learning how to solve problems and resolve conflict is an essential skill set for your child to learn. It’s important they learn how to observe the problem, figure out how they are feeling, determine how they want to feel, think about solutions, and then come up with a plan to fix the problem. This article has some great ways to help teach your child problem-solving skills.

Have you successfully incorporated social-emotional learning into activities with your child with autism both at home and at school? What is your advice for other parents? Leave a comment below so that we can share and encourage each other on this journey.

Additional Resources

Want some additional resources? Check out these.

Social Cipher Online Game (read my review and use Code TAMARA10 at checkout)

50 Social Emotional Learning Lessons Vol. 1 (affiliate link)

Happy or Not Board Game (affiliate link)

Sometimes I Have Big Feelings: A Child’s Guide to Understanding and Expressing Emotions (affiliate link)

Social-Emotional Learning for Autistic Kids: Fun Activities to Manage Big Feelings and Make Friends (For Ages 5-10) (affiliate link)

The post Exploring Social Emotional Learning’s Impact on Children with Autism appeared first on Autism & ADHD Connection.

Is there a connection between food and ADHD?

Brain anatomy, genetics, head injuries and even certain problems during pregnancy can result in a person having ADHD. The child’s diet does not cause ADHD.

Studies have shown that a child eating too much sugar or any specific foods or additives does not cause or significantly contribute to their ADHD. In fact, anyone with ADHD needs a healthy diet like we all do, and eating well will enhance their overall well-being and health. Ensuring that your child is getting the nutrients and minerals they need through their diet is very important for their development and brain health.

Are there certain foods your child should avoid if they have ADHD?

Studies are inconclusive about eliminating a specific food or additive to improve ADHD symptoms such as hyperactivity. However, some studies have shown that eliminating foods that your child is sensitive to from their diet has shown promise for improved behavior and cognitive function as well as decreasing the triggers for ADHD (Curr Nutr Rep. 2023; 12(3): 383–394.)

What foods tend to have the highest sensitivities? Some common ones can include:

• Dairy products, especially milk
• Eggs
• Tomatoes
• Foods containing artificial food dyes
• Chocolate
• Oranges
• Grapes
• Beans
• Foods containing gluten
• Wheat (in addition to it having gluten)
• Corn
• Soy

If your child’s behavior seems worse after eating any of these foods or their gastrointestinal system doesn’t like these foods, try eliminating them from your child’s diet. If your child improves, it may be worth avoiding that food as much as you can.

My son J doesn’t have any food sensitivities, but he is allergic to peanuts and another couple of nuts. That has been difficult to maneuver because so many foods have at least traces of nuts. Thankfully, I’ve learned to navigate the labels on food items and keep them out of our diet. That would be the same though for a food sensitivity because as a parent we have to look at the ingredients carefully when buying food for our kids and families.

Also, when J was younger, I knew he was sensitive to eating too much sugar. His behavior would worsen with the “sugar high,” and then he would really crash when his glucose level would go back down. However, I don’t believe that sugar was one of the foods that affected his ADHD. I think he was more sensitive to the glucose spikes from too much sugar, so I learned to minimize it.

What foods should you encourage your child with ADHD to eat?

Like I mentioned before, those with ADHD need a healthy, balanced diet like we all do. If you are looking for a good guide, I really like MyPlate from the USDA. J’s nutritionist introduced us to this resource, and it has been really helpful for me, both for myself and as a parent with planning family meals and snacks.

MyPlate has a kids page that even includes games and other educational material to teach your child about nutrition.

We all need a variety of fruits, vegetables, grains, protein and dairy (unless you or your child has dairy food sensitivities) each day. The thing I like about MyPlate is that you can use their online calculator to put in your or your child’s age, weight, height and activity level to get the suggested number of calories you need daily plus a guide on the amount of food needed in each food group.

What has been your experience with foods and ADHD with your child? What advice would you give other parents? Leave a comment so that we can all share and encourage each other on this journey.

Additional resources

If you are interested in more information about helping your autistic child with ADHD eat well, check out these.

 Smart Foods for ADHD and Brain Health (affiliate link)

The Disconnected Kids Nutrition Plan: Proven Strategies to Enhance Learning and Focus for Children with Autism, ADHD, Dyslexia, and Other Neurological Disorders (affiliate link)

Ultimate Kids’ Guide to Being Super Healthy: What You Need To Know About Nutrition, Exercise, Sleep, Hygiene, Stress, Screen Time, and More (affiliate link)

Broccoli Boot Camp: Basic Training for Parents of Selective Eaters (affiliate link)

Mark Twain Healthy Eating, Exercise, and Sleep Mindfulness Workbook for Teens, Health and Fitness, Mental Health, Growth Mindset & Nutrition Book, Health and Wellness Workbooks for Teens and Pre-Teens (affiliate link)

The post Can certain foods trigger worse symptoms in your child with ADHD? appeared first on Autism & ADHD Connection.

My son J has always enjoyed July 4^th celebrations. Thankfully, he loved seeing the fireworks and even with his ultra-hearing sensitivities, the booms from them didn’t bother him too much. We usually stayed home and maybe had grandparents or friends over for a cookout. Our neighborhood had firework displays that rivaled the big ones in the city, so we didn’t have to deal with the crowds to see the festivities. That made things easier for us, and J had a good time most years. I think it would have been more difficult had we ventured downtown in our city and tried to fight our way through crowds to see the fireworks. We and J would have been stressed by it all.

Fireworks and Sensory Issues

Making July 4^th fun for your autistic child really comes down to planning the holiday activities based on what your child can handle and trying to align that with what works for your family overall. If you have other children who really love the big fireworks show, then maybe one parent takes them to that and the other checks out the fireworks in your neighborhood or area with your autistic child. If you cannot divide and conquer, maybe you look at events online and see if you can find a smaller fireworks show in a nearby town that isn’t quite as crowded. We did that one year when we went out to a smaller event where my mom lives, and J and our whole family really enjoyed it.

If fireworks in person are just too much for your child, some shows are broadcasted on TV or online. That could be a great way for your autistic child to still enjoy them but in a way that doesn’t trigger any sensory issues.

Other ways to make July 4^th more fun for your autistic child

Try some of these other tips to help make the July 4^th holiday more enjoyable for your autistic child.

• Remember to bring your child’s noise-cancelling headphones, sunglasses and other items to help with any sensory issues if you are going to a celebration away from home.
• If you go to a family member’s or friend’s home for a gathering, ensure you identify a quiet place that your child can retreat to if they are overwhelmed or need a place to hang out for a while.
• Be sure to bring a favorite dish and snacks for your autistic child to ensure they have food they like at a party or gathering.
• Take some favorite toys or an activity bag of things your child enjoys if you are going to a fireworks display and will be waiting for a while for the show to begin.
• Give your autistic child advance notice on how their routines will change that day and night, so they are not surprised.
• Consider a movie night if going elsewhere or being outside will be too overwhelming for your autistic child for the holiday.

Remember that there is no right way to celebrate July 4^th. Do what is best for your autistic child and family. You can have fun in so many different ways that will honor what works for your family. So, what are some things you do to make July 4^th fun for your autistic child?

Additional resources

Want some additional information or ideas for your celebration? Check out these resources.

Headphones: A Book for Children With Autism & Sensory Disorders (affiliate link)

Celebrate Independence Day: Multicomponent Educational Rhyming Story (affiliate link)

JOYIN 15 Pcs 4th of July Accessories (affiliate link)

6 Pack of American Flag Sunglasses (affiliate link)

The Night Before the Fourth of July (affiliate link)

The post 8 ways to make your July 4th celebration fun for your autistic child appeared first on Autism & ADHD Connection.

How do you define Asperger Syndrome?

Psychology Today defines Asperger Syndrome as “a high-functioning form of autism. Although it was once classified as its own condition, Asperger’s is no longer an official diagnosis in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM). The behavior ascribed to Asperger’s is now encompassed under the umbrella diagnosis of Autism Spectrum Disorder.

People with high-functioning autism/Asperger’s often have difficulty with social situations, and they may not be able to understand the perspectives and feelings of others. However, their language and cognitive skills are often typical.

People with the condition may also engage in specific, repetitive body movements. They often have an orientation toward detail and an interest in systemizing, which can come across as an obsession. Some may show remarkable facility in a narrowly focused and usually non-social area, such as baseball statistics or train schedules.”

Why is it called Asperger Syndrome?

Asperger Syndrome was named after the Austrian pediatrician Hans Asperger. He characterized the traits in boys that he observed in the mid-1940’s. He didn’t name it himself; instead, it was named for him.

There is controversy around Asperger and the work he did for the Nazis in Germany during World War II. Some people are glad it is no longer its own diagnosis for that reason.

Some identify with it as a milder form of autism

Those with this diagnosis are usually on Level 1 of the autism spectrum. Some of their traits or characteristics may be described as milder than others, but it really depends on the individual.

My son J fits into this category well. While he may be described as having a “milder” form of autism, he still struggles with some communication, social situations, executive function and to a lesser degree now with emotional control. With his ADHD, impulse control, focus and hyperactivity are also a challenge for him.

For him, he does identify overall more with being autistic and will usually tell people he has autism. However, every once in a while, he will note he has Asperger Syndrome, which seems to be how many I’ve met who receive that diagnosis will refer to themselves.

Why do some people still refer to themselves as having Asperger Syndrome instead of autism?

When neurotypicals think of autism, many tend to focus on the Level 2 and Level 3 autism that is moderate to severe. For those who received an Asperger Syndrome diagnosis, they choose to still use that instead of considering themselves autistic. Also, since it was their specific diagnosis, they choose to refer to themselves as “Aspie” or having Asperger’s.

Why? For some, they feel it better describes their traits and characteristics, and there is less stigma associated with Asperger’s Syndrome. They also believe they can better navigate the neurotypical world if they don’t have an “autism” label (even though they still have plenty of challenges and can become exhausted from masking so much of the time).

Did your teen or young adult receive an Asperger Syndrome diagnosis? If so, do they identify more with being autistic or Aspie? Leave a comment so that we can share and encourage each other along this journey!

Additional resources

Want to learn more about Asperger Syndrome? Check out these resources that are available.

The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome (affiliate link)

ADHD and Asperger Syndrome in Smart Kids and Adults (affiliate link)

Parenting a Teen or Young Adult with Asperger Syndrome (affiliate link)

Freaks, Geeks and Aspergers Syndrome: A User Guide to Adolescence (affiliate link)

Asperger Syndrome and Adolescence: Helping Preteens & Teens Get Ready for the Real World (affiliate link)

The post What is Asperger Syndrome and how does it fit into the autism spectrum? appeared first on Autism & ADHD Connection.

I have been in this situation many times with my son J. I have had to find new providers and services for him several times during our autism/ADHD journey. It hasn’t been easy, and I’ve reached out in different ways to different people and organizations over the years. I thought it would be helpful to share how I’ve found services in case it will help other parents.

Searching online is always an option for finding services, however, you may or may not find the best information that way. Here are some other ways I have successfully found autism and ADHD programs and services for my son.

1. Reach out to other parents of autistic/ADHD children for recommendations

I have found that recommendations from other parents is one of the best ways to start finding providers when I needed new care or services for J. Of course, when he was first diagnosed, I didn’t do this because I didn’t know any other parents of autistic children. However, as I’ve made friends in the autism community, this has been a great step to take whenever a new need has arisen.

2. Talk to the special services/education director or speech therapist at your child’s school

If your child is receiving services at school through an Individualized Education Plan (IEP), then talking to the school’s special services director or even your child’s speech therapist can provide you with valuable information. They know so many resources and providers in your community, and they can give you contact information to get you started. I found them so helpful when my son was in elementary school.

3. Ask your autistic child’s case manager if your child has the Medicaid waiver

If your child has an autism Medicaid waiver, I found our case manager to be a wealth of information. Even if the services or care I was looking for wasn’t something covered by the waiver, she knew so many resources in the community and could point me in the right direction. It was usually a good starting point for me to inquire and do additional research.

4. Call your health plan’s member line

Believe it or not, I’ve found good services and providers by calling my health plan’s member services line and talking to a customer representative. The good thing about doing this is that I knew what the insurance coverage would be for the care I was seeking, and the providers were in-network. Some representatives are more helpful than others, but this could be a good option especially if the care is going to be more expensive and you want to be sure you know what your benefits cover.

5. Call your local autism and/or ADHD organizations to find services

Another way to find autism and ADHD services or programs in your area is to contact your local autism and ADHD organizations. Most states have a local chapter of the Autism Society, and many areas may have local or regional organizations. I used to serve on the board of directors for the Autism Community Connection, which is an autism organization serving the county I live in. We received calls and emails often from parents asking for recommendations and information about care and other resources in our area.

Once you have recommendations, you can then talk to your child’s doctor about their thoughts and possible referrals (depending on your health plan’s benefit requirements if it is a covered service). You may want to reach out to the providers and see if you can interview them

first. I have an article about the process and questions I used to find my son a good therapist. I found doing some homework first and then talking to my son’s doctor usually gave me better results. She said it even helped her in some cases because I found more information that she wasn’t aware of at the time!

It’s so important that you find the care and services your autistic child needs, and then find the provider that will be the best fit for them. Are there other ways you’ve successfully found autism care and services for your child? If so, leave a comment so that we can share and encourage each other on this journey.

Additional resources

If you’d like to learn more about some care and services for your autistic child, check out these resources.

The Parent’s Guide to Occupational Therapy for Autism and Other Special Needs (affiliate link)

Caring for Autism: Practical Advice from a Parent and Physician (affiliate link)

The Complete Guide to Autism & Healthcare: Advice for Medical Professionals and People on the Spectrum (affiliate link)

Taking Care of Myself 2: for Teenagers and Young Adults with ASD (affiliate link)

The Autism Mom’s Survival Guide (for Dads, too!): Creating a Balanced and Happy Life While Raising a Child with Autism (affiliate link)

The post 5 ways to find local autism and ADHD programs and services for your child appeared first on Autism & ADHD Connection.

What are executive function skills?

First, what are executive function skills? The Harvard Center for the Developing Child says “executive function and self-regulation skills are the mental processes that enable us to plan, focus attention, remember instructions, and juggle multiple tasks successfully. Just as an air traffic control system at a busy airport safely manages the arrivals and departures of many aircraft on multiple runways, the brain needs this skill set to filter distractions, prioritize tasks, set and achieve goals, and control impulses.”

I love this definition and the analogy they use with air traffic controllers. It’s a great way to think about how we use these essential skills every day.

Executive function skills are bucketed into three categories:

• Working Memory – the ability to hold information for following instructions, planning, organizing, etc.
• Cognitive or Flexible Thinking – this is the ability to think about things in more than one way and is important for problem solving
• Inhibitory or Self Control – this includes the ability to pay attention and resist distractions and/or temptations

Some specific executive function skills include:

• Impulse control
• Emotional control
• Planning
• Task initiation and completion
• Organizing
• Self-monitoring
• Prioritizing
• Perseverance
• Time management

How do you determine which executive function skills your autistic child lacks?

How can you determine which executive function skills your child or teen with autism and ADHD lacks? Observing their behavior or struggles in school can help most parents, caregivers or teachers fairly easily identify which of these skills a child or teen lacks.

When determining my son J’s executive function skills level (and my own as his parent), I liked the assessment that was included in the “Smart but Scattered Teens: The “Executive Skills” Program for Helping Teens Reach Their Potential” book (affiliate link). It helps you determine what are your teen’s strengths and weaknesses when it comes to executive function skills. It also helps you rank them as which ones are the most prevalent. This can help you determine how you can best help your child.

I also learned from the book that if one of your strengths in executive function skills is one of your child’s or teen’s biggest weaknesses, then you probably are not the best person to help your child improve that one. It’s best to seek help from others to help your child.

Ways the lack of executive function skills are holding back your child with autism and ADHD

Lacking these essential skills in life can affect your autistic/ADHD child or teen in many ways. These can include:

1. Impact to relationships

If your child has difficulty controlling their emotions and impulsivity, their relationships will suffer because you as a parent, other relatives, teachers, peers, friends and others can grow frustrated over time at the repeat of the same issues related to these. Lack of these executive function skills can greatly and negatively impact their relationships with many people in their lives.

2.  Ability to master life skills

Life skills that require planning, organizing, task initiation/completion, prioritization and more can be greatly affected by the lack of executive function skills. That could include money management, career development, household management, health care management, meal planning and more. Improving these important skills in life can help set your child or teen up for success as an adult.

3. Competence in school

Lack of executive function skills such as the ability to pay attention, working memory, time management and self-monitoring can affect your autistic child or teen’s ability to do well in school. If you help your child/teen improve some of these skills, they will be able to learn better at school.

4. Low self-esteem

The lack of executive function skills can make your child or teen think less of themselves because they struggle so much in school, home, extracurricular activities and relationships. This results in low self-esteem and decreased confidence in their own abilities.

5. Problem-solving capabilities

Not being able to be flexible and adaptable in their thinking may limit your autistic child or teen’s problem-solving capabilities. Helping them improve their executive function skills can really help them see things differently and understand others’ perspectives to better solve problems and issues.

How to help your child improve their executive function skills

While the lack of executive function skills can significantly affect your autistic/ADHD child or teen, the good news is that these skills can be improved! I have written many blog posts about improving different areas of executive function skills. To help your child or teen, read these posts for tips and steps you can take to help them.

• 4 ways to help your ADHD child with impulse control
• 12 ways to help your child with autism and ADHD improve executive function
• 14 ways to teach an autistic and ADHD child self-regulation
• 9 tips to teach your autistic and ADHD child or teen organization skills
• 4 ways to educate your autistic and ADHD child about perspective taking
• “Smart but Scattered Teens” helps parents collaborate with their autistic and ADHD teens to improve executive function skills
• 5 ways to help your autistic and ADHD child develop emotional control
• 8 ways to help your child with ADHD focus when bored or disinterested
• How to help your child with ADHD overcome procrastination
• 10 ways to help your autistic and ADHD child improve their working memory

What ways have you helped your child with autism and ADHD improve their executive function skills? Leave a comment below so that we can share and encourage each other on this journey!

Additional resources

Do you want to find out more about executive function skills and how to help your autistic/ADHD child or teen improve theirs? Take a look at these resources.

Executive Functioning Workbook for Kids: 40 Fun Activities to Build Memory, Flexible Thinking, and Self-Control Skills at Home, in School, and Beyond (affiliate link)

Executive Functioning Superpowers: Inclusive Strategies that Embrace Neurodiversity at Home and in the Classroom. Helping Kids Stay Calm, Get Organized and Achieve Success (affiliate link)

The Executive Functioning Workbook for Teens: Help for Unprepared, Late, and Scattered Teens (affiliate link)

Smart but Scattered: The Revolutionary “Executive Skills” Approach to Helping Kids Reach Their Potential (affiliate link)

Executive Functioning Skills for Teens: Super Easy to Use Strategies, Games, Tools, and Activities That Work! Help Your Kids Get Organized, Improve Focus, Self Confidence, and Life Skills (affiliate link)

The post 5 ways the lack of executive function skills are holding back your child with autism and ADHD appeared first on Autism & ADHD Connection.

What is autism?

The Mayo Clinic defines autism as a “condition related to brain development that impacts how a person perceives and socializes with others, causing problems in social interaction and communication. The disorder also includes limited and repetitive patterns of behavior. The term ‘spectrum’ in autism spectrum disorder refers to the wide range of symptoms and severity.

Autism spectrum disorder includes conditions that were previously considered separate — autism, Asperger’s syndrome, childhood disintegrative disorder and an unspecified form of pervasive developmental disorder. Some people still use the term ‘Asperger’s syndrome,’ which is generally thought to be at the mild end of autism spectrum disorder.”

While that is the clinical definition, I generally think of autistic individuals as having brains that are wired differently than those who are neurotypical. They think and approach things in a different way, which can be a great for diversity of thought and fresh perspectives in the world. Yet, these differences can be a real challenge for autistics, loved ones, friends, co-workers and others as they try to understand one another.

What are the traits of autism?

Autistic individuals can have a variety of traits. Not everyone will have all of these, and the mildness or severity of each will differ per person. If you’ve heard that each person who is autistic is unique, that is very true.

Common traits of autism can include:

• Difficulty with communication
• Lack of social skills
• Trouble with executive function skills
• Sensory issues
• Repetitive patterns of behavior
• Focused special interests
• Rigid adherence to routines
• Difficulty transitioning to new activities
• Stimming for self-regulation
• Learning difficulties
• Lack of eye contact
• Struggles with friendships
• Trouble with perspective taking

Autism is on a spectrum

Autism Spectrum Disorder is called that because autistic individuals have a wide range of capabilities and abilities depending on where they fall on the spectrum.

You may have heard some people describes autistic children as “low functioning” or “high functioning.” This isn’t really the best description because anyone who is autistic could be higher functioning in one area and lower functioning in another.

Autism is better explained by their levels:

•            Level One: Requires Support

•            Level Two: Requires Substantial Support

•            Level Three: Requires Very Substantial Support

For a better understanding of what each level looks like, you can read my blog post about the autism levels.

What causes autism?

Experts don’t know exactly what causes autism except that it is related to genetics. If you have a family member who is autistic, then your chances of having an autistic child are greater.

They have identified a few other factors that can increase the risk of a child having autism. Those include:

• If the child has Down Syndrome or Fragile X Syndrome (or another chromosomal disorder)
• Low birth rate or born pre-term
• Parents who are older when they conceive the child
• Pregnancy complications

Years ago, there was a push to say that vaccinations caused autism, but that theory was debunked a long time ago. There was one study that claimed it, but it was flawed. Scientists have found no association between childhood immunizations and autism. Yet, there are those who still promote this idea. If you hear anyone say that, know that it has been proven not to be true.

Autism vs. Autistic

You may hear a debate about whether autistic people want to be referred to as person or identify first. For the autistic community, the overall majority prefer “autistic” versus “with autism.”

Since I write my blog for parents of autistic children, I use both because I found parents sometimes prefer to note their child “with autism.” I try to be sensitive to both preferences by alternating how I use it on my blog. However, please note that autistic people themselves generally prefer to be referred to as being “autistic.”

What are the general supports that are provided to autistic children?

You may hear your family member or friend discuss various care and services they are getting for their autistic child. There are many options, and those depend on the challenges the child needs help with. They can include:

• Cognitive behavior therapy
• Speech therapy
• Occupational therapy
• Applied Behavioral Analysis (ABA)
• Individualized Education Plans (IEP) or 504 plans at school
• Behavior intervention plans
• Recreational therapy
• Music therapy
• Art therapy
• Equine therapy
• Medications
• Nutritional counseling
• Physical therapy

An autistic child may receive a few of these or many of them. It depends on their unique challenges.

Do people grow out of autism?

The media portray autism mostly as a childhood condition. However, autistic children grow into autistic adults. There is no “cure” for autism because it’s not an illness – it is a brain development. Once someone is autistic, they are autistic all their life. You can read my blog post about autistic adults.

How can I help my family member or friend who has an autistic child?

So how can you help your family member or a friend who is a parent of an autistic child? In more ways than you think. Here are some suggestions:

• Learn all you can about autism to understand their child and the child’s behavior.
• Be an ear to listen and a shoulder to cry on when needed. Having an autistic child has its rewards and challenges. Be there to celebrate every small victory for their child and also be there when the stress seems more than your family member or friend can handle.
• Invite them to do things. Even if they repeatedly have to decline (especially at the last minute), keep asking them to come to gatherings, birthday parties, playdates at the park, etc.
• Ask your family member or friend what can you do to make their child more comfortable when they visit your home. Maybe it’s identifying a safe place for them to go and calm down, keeping music and other noise to a minimum, or having the child’s favorite snack available. Let them know you want to help make things easier for them.
• Offer to give them respite by watching their child for an hour or two. That can make a huge difference for parents of an autistic child who do not get enough regular breaks. Many parents are reluctant to ask family and friends to help watch their child because they don’t want to burden them. Your offer to help would mean the world to them.
• Run an errand for your family member or friend. Sometimes, taking an autistic child on multiple errands can be challenging. Offer to pick up a few things at the grocery store or drug store for your friend, or run one of their other children to an activity for them.
• Find out what their autistic child’s special interest is and look for ways to support it. Maybe it’s an outing you can arrange or pick up a book that you think their child will enjoy. If you find a YouTube or other video related to their interest you think they would like, text the link to the parent to share with the child. Show that you care by being involved with what matters to their child.

Where can I find out more about autism?

If you want to dive deeper and find out more about autism, you can click on any of the website listed on my Resources page.

Here are some other resources you may find helpful.

30 Days to Understanding Autism (affiliate link)

Uniquely Human: Updated and Expanded: A Different Way of Seeing Autism (affiliate link)

The Reason I Jump: The Inner Voice of a Thirteen-Year-Old Boy with Autism (affiliate link)

The Autistic Brain: Helping Different Kinds of Minds Succeed (affiliate link)

Autism Spectrum Disorder (revised): The Complete Guide to Understanding Autism (affiliate link)

The post Autism explainer for family and friends appeared first on Autism & ADHD Connection.

Sensory issues, autism and ADHD

Sensory issues are very common with autism and ADHD. While the cause of sensory issues hasn’t been identified yet, experts believe the presence of them in people with autism and ADHD are related to the developmental delay of their brains. Scientists believe those with autism have a neurobiological dysfunction in the central nervous system. Sometimes this leads to overstimulation or under stimulation of the person’s senses.

Many children with autism and ADHD have sensory issues related to sight, hearing, touch, taste and/or smell. However, there are also “senses” linked to body awareness and balance that also can be impacted. These include:

• Vestibular – The inner ear structure that notes the position of your head and helps keep you balanced.
• Proprioception – The internal sense of your body that helps you maintain your posture and control how your body moves through space.
• Interoception – The sense of what is happening to your body and how you feel. For example, do you feel hot or cold? Can you feel your emotions?

Understanding your autistic/ADHD child’s sensory issues

The most common sensory issues with autistic children who have ADHD include:

• Bright light and light wavelengths
• Loud noises
• Tastes (e.g., textures of foods, intense spice, etc.)
• Strong smells (e.g., perfumes, air fresheners, body lotions, etc.)
• Too light of touch
• Need for deep touch (e.g., is under stimulated, so they need weighted blankets, deep massage, etc.)

Our son J has oversensitive hearing. The school psychologist described it this way to us: a loud flushing toilet in a public restroom sounds as loud to him as 747 jet taking off to us. That really put it into perspective for me. Thankfully, working with an excellent occupational therapist helped J desensitize his hearing so that noise is not so loud to him. It’s still louder to him than it is to us, but it’s more manageable.

When he was young, he also had sensitivity with his vestibular system. Fortunately, we had a trampoline and swing set in our backyard that helped him a great deal with this. In addition, his occupational therapist had him do specific exercises and activities at home to help with those as well.

You most likely know what your child’s sensory issues are but take the time to really observe your child to ensure you are capturing everything. It can help you determine how to best provide for their needs and if you need occupational or other therapy to assist your child in overcoming or managing them. The more you understand, the better you can meet your child’s sensory needs.

What type of sensory items could help your autistic/ADHD child?

The great thing about understanding your autistic/ADHD child’s sensory needs is that you can tailor the items that will help your child specifically.

Does your child need more stimulation? That can come in the form of movement with swings, trampolines or other items. Or maybe it’s a sandbox, water table, Play-doh, bead box, pop-its or other items that can help your child.

Or maybe your child needs a place to come down when they are overstimulated. That can be a part of a room where the lights can be dimmed or blinds pulled down, calming music can be played, and a weighted blanket is available.

Really, the options are many for a sensory space. What’s important is that you create it just for your child.

How to create a sensory space on a budget

When I was doing research for this blog post, I came across a website that had sensory room spaces available for more than $20,000! That is way out of the realm for most families with an autistic child. As a certified financial educator and mom to an autistic son, I know the financial burden of autism really affects families. And I know you don’t have to go overboard to create a great sensory space in your home for your child!

You can develop a sensory space for your child on whatever budget you have available. In fact, you can repurpose things you may already have around the home and don’t have to spend any money on new items. For example, if playing in water stimulates your child, look in your kitchen for cups, bowls or other items you can collect into a plastic bin you already have and place them in the bathroom where your child can use them in the sink or tub there. Or find a bucket, cups and plastic toys that you can keep in your garage and then fill the buckets from the hose on a warm day outside. Your child can then use the cups and toys to play in the water.

The first thing to do is locate an area that can be used as a safe space that your child can go to when they need sensory stimulation or a place to calm themselves. Don’t forget the areas outside too. I didn’t intentionally create our backyard into a sensory area for my son J, but it worked out that way. We had a trampoline, swing set, water table and sandbox for him and his brother. Those really helped him with some of his sensory issues when he was young!

Then, with the information you’ve gathered about your child’s sensory challenges, determine what you could place in the area that will help your child. These items could include:

• Pillows with different textures
• Weighted blanket
• Bins of sensory toys such as fidget toys, pop-its, Play-doh, bead boxes and more
• Exercise ball
• Sensory indoor swing (if you want to install one in your home – or you can hang a swing from tree in your yard too; affiliate links)
• Crash pad that can be made with a duvet stuffed with blankets, pillows and stuffed animals [or you could purchase one if preferred (affiliate link)]
• Tactile wall or board [you can create your own or purchase one (affiliate link)]
• Calming music
• Dimmed lighting
• Mini trampoline (affiliate link) or a larger trampoline for outside (affiliate link)

You also may find other items that can help your child in their sensory space. A sensory space for your child with autism and ADHD can make a big difference in their comfort and behavior.

Have you created a sensory space for your child with autism and ADHD? Leave a comment to let us know about your experience and what worked for your child. That way, we can share and encourage each other along this journey!

Additional resources

Do you want more information about sensory issues, autism and ADHD? Take a look at these resources available.

Temple Talks about Autism and Sensory Issues: The World’s Leading Expert on Autism Shares Her Advice and Experiences (affiliate link)

Sensory Perceptual Issues in Autism and Asperger Syndrome, Second Edition: Different Sensory Experiences (affiliate link)

Making Sense: A Guide to Sensory Issues (affiliate link)

Meltdown Management: Strategies to Handle Meltdowns in Children with Autism and Special Needs (affiliate link)

My Sensory Book: Working Together to Explore Sensory Issues and the Big Feelings They Can Cause: A Workbook for Parents, Professionals, and Children (affiliate link)

The post Create a sensory space in your home for your child with autism and ADHD appeared first on Autism & ADHD Connection.

What are the autism diagnosis levels?

The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 5th Edition, defines Autism Spectrum Disorder with three levels to help healthcare professionals, parents, educators and others determine the amount of support and treatment or therapies a person on the spectrum needs. It’s not a perfect system, but it is better than trying to define the amount functionality an autistic person has.

Here are the three levels:

• Level One: Requires Support
• Level Two: Requires Substantial Support
• Level Three: Requires Very Substantial Support

What do the autism levels look like practically?

So, it’s great to have the autism levels, but what do they mean and how do they look in a practical sense to help you and your child’s doctor define where your child falls on the spectrum?

Autism Level One: Requires Support

Autistic children on Level One require some support but not a lot. This is where my son J falls on the spectrum. He was originally diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome (no longer its own diagnosis), so we used to note he was “high functioning.” Yet, that didn’t really accurately describe him because in some ways he was but in other areas he needed more help. We obtained that help for him through speech therapy during elementary school, occupational therapy, cognitive behavior therapy, medication and job coaching.

How does Autism Level One translate practically? Those on Level One generally:

• Need some help in improving their communications with those who are neurotypical, especially their peers
• Speak well, in complete sentences and comprehensively, but they tend to fatigue during long back-and-forth conversations with neurotypicals
• Tend to mask long-term to better fit into their environment (which can lead to autistic burnout)
• Have difficulty knowing the right thing to say or do in social situations
• Find they have a lack organizational and other executive function skills
• Focus on special interests
• Have some challenge in shifting from one activity to another and can be inflexible in actions and thought patterns at times
• Tend to persevere, or focus on something longer than necessary
• Experience some sensory issues
• Will usually become independent eventually, but it may look different than their neurotypical peers

Those on Level One will need some therapies and treatments to help them function and communicate better in the world. They also will need some accommodations at school to help them be more successful academically.

Autism Level Two: Requires Substantial Support

Individuals who are on Level Two require substantial support. Traits and abilities in these individuals can include:

• Have difficulty communicating in ways that neurotypicals understand, using fewer words and noticeably different speech patterns
• Socialize in ways that neurotypicals don’t comprehend, such as walking away from a conversation and many times missing facial and body language cues from others
• Are focused on very specific interests that may be considered strange or even bizarre by someone who is neurotypical
• Tend to have more challenge shifting from one activity to the next one
• Use more excessive stimming behaviors to self-regulate
• Have more substantial sensory issues

Those on Level Two will require more support than those on Level One. They will need more school accommodations, and additional therapy and treatment will be needed to help them function better.

Autism Level Three: Requires Very Substantial Support

Those on Level Three are more severe or profound in their autistic traits and have lower capabilities. Most autistic people who are Level Three will need others to care for them their entire lives.

Individuals on Level Three may:

• Be non-verbal or only use echolalia to communicate, which may require them to use an augmented and alternative communication (AAC) device to help them communicate
• Interact with others on a limited basis, mostly to have a need met
• Prefer to do things alone instead of with others
• Have significant social deficiencies and little interest in developing friendships
• Show more stimming needs such as rocking, spinning and  other such behaviors
• Become distressed when switching tasks or activities
• Be unable to mask and fit in with others
• Have difficulty completing daily living activities by themselves

Autistic children and teens on Level Three are most likely to be in special education classrooms at school or even receive only one-on-one instruction to help with basic academic and more life skills. They also will benefit from a greater array of therapies and treatments.

Why are the levels better to use than functionality in explaining autism to others?

As a parent, I find using the levels can be better in explaining my son and his abilities to others. Trying to use high or low function to describe our autistic children’s capabilities is difficult. That is because they can be higher functioning in some areas, and then need much more support and considered lower functioning in other areas. And then what does high functioning or low functioning really mean and what about all the people who are in the middle of those two bookends?

So many people who aren’t educated about autism tend to rely on stereotypes they see in the media. I did my capstone project for my master’s degree on evaluating the types of descriptions that media use to characterize autistic individuals. My research showed three primary characterizations: patients, savants and victims. Even though “patients” were the most common type, the media primarily portrayed those with more Level Three autism in their stories. Being able to use these more defined levels can help parents better understand and explain where their child falls on the spectrum.

Using the levels is also how the medical community now determines the level of support a person needs. It can help you as a parent know more about the types of care and services you will need for your child.

Do you use the autism levels to better understand and explain to others about where your autistic child falls on the spectrum? What has been your experience? Leave a comment below so that we can share and encourage one another on this journey.

Additional resources

Looking for more information? Take a look at these resources available.

Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD): Autism Types, Diagnosis, Symptoms, Treatment, Causes, Neurodevelopmental Disorders, Prognosis, Research, History, Myths, and More! Autism Explained (affiliate link)

Not Atypical Motherhood: The Guide for Navigating a Child’s New Autism Diagnosis (affiliate link)

Talking with Your Child about Their Autism Diagnosis (affiliate link)

My Awesome Autism: Helping children learn about their autism diagnosis (affiliate link)

Navigating the Spectrum: A Guide for Autistic Parents of Autistic Children (affiliate link)

The post Autism Levels: Understanding where your child falls on the Autism Spectrum Disorder appeared first on Autism & ADHD Connection.

Awareness vs. Acceptance

As a parent, I’ve found over the past 15 years since J was diagnosed that many more people are aware of autism. They may not fully understand it, and they instead may lean more heavily in the stereotypes of autistic people that are readily available in popular media. But I rarely meet a person who isn’t aware of autism these days.

I do see people struggle with understanding how autistic individuals operate and approach the world that was made for neurotypicals. They don’t know how to fully accept how autistics fit into their community as neighbors, co-workers, parents and citizens.

Autism Spectrum Disorder is just that – a broad spectrum of capabilities and challenges. We don’t like to use high or low functioning labels, and it makes sense some individuals can be very high functioning in some areas of their lives and lower functioning in others. I’ve started explaining the tiers (levels 1,2 and 3) of autism to help others better understand where my son and others may fall within the spectrum. That seems to be an easier and more accurate way to explain it.

Yet, we have a long way to go in having our autistic children – no matter their age – accepted in this world. Whether it’s at school, church, sports teams or even the workplace, too many of our children still face isolation, bullying and misunderstanding. As parents, we advocate for our kids, teens and young adults every day. We then must teach them how to advocate for themselves.

Stepping up your advocacy for autism

So how can we as parents, caregivers, teachers and other proponents of autistic children and adults seek more acceptance for them? I’ve been asking myself this question a lot lately. What can I do? Then if I can do it, you could do it too.

Here are some things I’ve thought of that I can do to help:

• I can help my son live his best life by continuing to get him the help he needs for struggles he has. He has a great therapist to help with his depression. J has a wonderful job coach through Vocational Rehabilitation. She is helping him find new job that is a better fit for him. I am helping him navigate starting classes again at our community college.
• Although I haven’t paid as much in attention in the past of autism-related policies, I am learning more about that. As policies, regulations and laws are brought forth in all levels of government, I can use my voice to reach out to my legislators and council members to let them know my support or opposition to what they propose.
• I can volunteer my time and talents to support local organizations that serve the autism community. I was a board member for three years for my local Autism Community Connection and felt like I was really helping families affected by autism in our area.
• As I have since J was diagnosed, I will continue to look for opportunities to educate others about autism and what life with it really looks like.
• This blog is one of the ways that I have to help support other parents with autistic children who also have ADHD. I have learned so much over the past 15 years that I want to use that to help others. I also love to research and learn new things, so I want those talents to also benefit others as I share what I learn.

How can you help drive more acceptance for autism?

Ask yourself today what can you do to help strive for more acceptance for your autistic child? If you are overwhelmed, it may be some baby steps you can take. However, if you are in a similar season of life like me where you do have some more time available, maybe there are bigger steps you can take.

Any momentem forward is good and can help progress acceptance of our children in this world.

Leave a comment below to share what Autism Acceptance Month means to you!

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